10 Alternative Ways to Show your love (That Don’t Involve Panic-Buying)
We all know the date BUT for some reason Valentine’s Day sneaks up every year like it’s got something to prove. Suddenly the shops are full of heart-shaped everything, restaurant bookings are gone, and the price of roses has quietly doubled overnight.
We’ve all fallen for it, been drawn in, thought it what was expected of us. Somewhere along the way I realised something important: love doesn’t cost a thing
If you want to show someone you care — whether it’s Valentine’s Day, a random Tuesday, or the day after a spectacular argument — here are some alternative ways to do it that feel a bit more human.
1. Cook Their Favourite Meal (Even If It’s Not Fancy)
Not a five-course masterpiece. Not something you found on page 17 of a lifestyle magazine. I mean their meal. The slightly odd one. The comfort dish. The thing they order every time without fail.
There’s something deeply intimate about cooking for someone. It says, “I know you.” It says, “I remembered.” It also says, “Yes, I burned the first batch, but I tried again.” And if it goes wrong? Laugh. Order takeaway. Eat it on the floor. That might be the better memory anyway.
2. Write a Letter. A Real One
You might have to go out and buy a pen and some paper! (You don’t really need a seal)
A proper letter.
The kind where your handwriting gets progressively worse because you’re trying to say something that actually matters. The kind where you admit something slightly embarrassing — like how you still replay the first time you met. I once found a note my partner had tucked into a book I rarely open. It wasn’t poetic. It wasn’t perfect. But it was probably THE most romantic thing he EVER did
I kept it.
3. Do the Thing They Hate Doing
This is not glamorous. It will not photograph well. But doing the school run. Or calling the insurance company. Or fixing the wobbly cupboard door they’ve mentioned five times. That’s love in its work clothes. Grand gestures are lovely. But everyday effort? That’s where real commitment lives.
4. Plan a “Memory Date”
Go back to where you first met. Or book a trip to where you took your first holiday. Or just to the café or pub where you once talked for three hours about absolutely nothing. Revisit it intentionally. Say, “Remember when…?”
It’s amazing how revisiting a place can remind you why you chose each other in the first place.
Check it out first though as the original place may have turned into a dodgy part of the island, vape shop, car park or has just been demolished
5. Create a “Reasons Why” Jar
Write small, specific reasons you love them. Not generic ones. Not “you’re amazing.” More like:
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“You always check the back door twice.”
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“You make tea without being asked.”
- I really love your squidgy bum
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“You still dance terribly in the kitchen.”
Put them in a jar. Let them open one whenever they need a reminder. It’s the little things that mean alot
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6. Give Them Time Alone
Sometimes love isn’t togetherness. It’s space. An afternoon off. A booked massage. A few uninterrupted hours to read, nap, or stare at a wall without someone asking what’s for dinner.
If you’ve ever lived with someone, you know how radical and generous silence can be.
7. Start a Tiny Tradition
A monthly sunset walk. A silly selfie in the same pose every year. Take turns to pick films for a monthly film night, buy popcorn and pick a mix sweets………….don’t fall asleep if it’s not your turn. Pick out a recipe for each other to cook. Get a wine/beer subscription and have a tasting evenings.
Traditions are anchors. They quietly say, “We’re building something.” Years later, you’ll look back and realise those tiny rituals became the story.
8.
Donate to something meaningful to them. Volunteer together. Sign up for that charity run they’ve been talking about.
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9. Capture an Ordinary Moment (and have it framed)
Not posed. Not filtered.
A quick photo of them laughing mid-sentence. Or half-asleep with morning hair doing whatever it wants.
Years from now, you won’t care about the staged perfection. You’ll care about proof that this ordinary life happened — and that it was yours.
10. Simply Show Up
This one sounds almost too obvious. But showing up — consistently — is wildly underrated. Answering the call. Sitting beside them at the doctor. Listening to the long version of the story. Staying when things are inconvenient.
NOW THAT’S LOVE
And finally
Valentine’s Day can be sweet. I’m not anti-flowers or anti-chocolate (very much pro-chocolate, in fact). But the most meaningful expressions of love are rarely in soft focus surrounded by hearts. If you’re celebrating this year, make it personal. Make it slightly messy. Make it real.
Because love don’t (have to) cost a thing!.